Help me to decide

Why should I grieve because of a thorn?
Once it had made laughter known to me.
Whatever you lost through the stroke of destiny,
know it was to save you from adversity.
One small affliction keeps off greater afflictions;
one small loss prevents greater losses.

-Rumi

I dont know much. I have been comforting myself to accept things. Till now, im struggling still. Fighting the battle within. Trying to rationalize to myself. “God knows best”…

 

Sometimes i wonder why am i so weak, sensitive and emotional over matters. Is it just me or it’s a natural feelings and emotions to feel so? Haiz.. God, life is so hard. I just need You to be strong. I fall so many times and i knw i will fall again.. Make me stand. Make me strong and increase my endurance. I need to relax. To feel Your love..

Future is the unseen world. I will never know what would happen. I anticipate too much in life. I think too much. Why does the confidence fade when i need it? Really…

Deep down my heart. I really love You. I ever compromised my love for You. And that was a big and catasrrophic mistake. Oh dear… let not that happen again.. I just cant imagine living here in this world knowing that You are not pleased with me..

She is very far from me. He left me. And i realize i have no one to talk to when i need most. Not even my parents..  Only then i think and really feel You are so closed to me. I feel Your presence. I know You see me crying and begging in front of you. Your presence comforts me even when i dont say a word..

Now that i have to decide. I need You to help me to decide. What may seem nice and good to me would not necessary be so. You know best. I know this is a major decision to make. And i cant move on without Your consent. Please give indication- whether it is bad or good. I will accept.

 

Thank You God =)

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